Let me first state that I’m actually a great fan of the series but I’ve shed the adoration for team Edward to be an objective critic.

Popular culture announces the Twilight Saga is enormous force to be reckoned with, even with over-flowery prose and a distinct lack of conventional obedience.

Drawing on the school of Psychoanalysis developed by Sigmund Freud, it can help explain why paranormal romance, specifically vampire-centric, holds such appeal to a female audience. Not only is a vampire a creature shrouded in mystery but usually the act of a male vampire biting a female human has phallic symbolism. The female victim is effectively being speared and dominated by the vampire which in turn helps to assuage the female’s feelings according to Freud’s Castration Theory. (Please keep in mind that this is simply an application of a literary theory which helps to explain the appeal of Twilight.)

Moving on the conventions of vampire focussed texts, which if is taken into critical observation is exceptionally frustrating. Meyer nearly breaks every single traditional vampire convention except the phallic symbolism of biting, an unquenchable thirst for blood and lack of aging.

If the first rays of dawn shine upon Meyer’s vampires, instead of bursting into flames they glisten and sparkle somewhat akin to a Christmas tree bauble. Garlic and holy water are also ineffective as tools of destruction.

So let’s get rid of the vampire aspect of Edward Cullen shall we? Let’s substitute it for something else. Magician? Rehash of the Harry Potter legacy. Werewolf? We already have them on team Jacob. Incubus? Effectively renders audience potential to the over eighteen category. So without the glowing eyes, indulgence in self-hatred and eternal life poor human Edward Cullen holds very little appeal, doesn’t he?

So let’s use the only thing that works.

Vampire.

On Saturday afternoon, Tom Shortt, candidate for the Labour Party in the Limerick City North ward, kicked off his media campaign with his brother the comedian Pat Shortt in Limerick City’s skatepark.

The time for the media photoshoot to get underway was stated to be noon, it started late in true Irish style. The campaign billboards dotted around the skatepark are creations of local graffiti artists.

I managed to capture a video of both Tom and Pat Shortt sliding down a ramp on skateboards. The moment of Pat Shortt injuring his ankle due to this stunt is visible but alas the batteries in the small camera died, hence the tiny amount of footage.